by Nadia Kingsley
A new year begins.
The first without my mother in it.
I feel like a little rowboat that’s lost its anchor and is drifting out to sea.
I need a plan.
I have been going through Mum’s boxes and found her notebooks from when she went to cordon bleu lessons when I was a child. Found the coffee and brandy gateau recipe. It’s like having her back – seeing her handwriting again! And the stains from her checking the measurements look so fresh!
I have started a blog!
I thought – if I work through some of my favourite puddings from Mum’s notebooks – I can then post photos, the recipes, invite comments, make new friends, AND feel close to her again. Don’t worry – you are still my best friend. But – I really need this.
You won’t believe what the last six months have been like! The awards were a big surprise, as was the feature on me in The Guardian. The dinner tables I’ve been invited to – I can’t start to list the celebrities I’ve met, and the blog has such a following now! Orange refrigerator cake got a million hits! I now have a book deal. Wheeeeee!
They’ve taken away my belt, my shoelaces, my life.
It’s not my responsibility that that guy was allergic to gooseberries. And I only made a tiny little typo in the recipe over the quantity of vanilla extract. They’re all jealous of my success that’s all. My life is in tatters. I blame my mother. We’ve got a lot of time ahead together, dear dear diary.
© Nadia Kingsley 2016